I killed my Mazda :(

I had a really bad day at work--drama w/ people, also had a bad migraine. Well, I still needed to go to the grocery store because we have no food. So I started down the road twds the grocery store and just really wasn't paying attention (thinking about the drama at work that I was upset about and my head hurt sooo bad). I didn't notice the light turn red because I looked down for a second..when I looked up I was crashing into the lady's car. I remember thinking, "I'm going to hit her, I'm about to have an accident." Then we hit--it was pretty hard (going about 40, no braking), both of my airbags deployed.  I was in shock because I couldn't breathe for a minute. I sat there and some man came over and knocked on my window and said to get out because my car was on fire. I was dazed though and he snapped me out of it. The other lady was ok (she says her shoulder or neck or something hurts, but refused an ambulance and therefore said she was not injured). Paul's parents came with Paul and waited with me 'til the police came (I was so upset!). My car is totaled, her car may or may not be totaled. Her car I hit on the drivers side...our cars made a T..so the front of my little mazda was smashed and it wouldn't turn on (I think that's cause of the airbags though?). Not how I planned on getting a new car....I have no money saved for a down payment! Oh, it was totally my fault so I got a ticket and have to go to court in Sep. It was a great way to end an awesome day, believe me.  

I, being an organized/busy person, typically have my entire life in the car. Since I've been going back and forth from Fl. and also doing laundry at other people's houses my car was FULL of stuff. Ok, so that was excusable--all the trash I had on the floor was not. *sigh* That was embarrassing, but oh well it's over with now. Watching my car being towed away was sad. I paid for that car myself when I graduated highschool. He was with me for five years and a lot of fun times and trips.  My little mazda proved to be a good, reliable car and I will miss it. As much as I wanted a new car, I kept saying, "hold on mazda, don't die yet." And, vibrations, noises or not this last six months or so, it still worked. 

Now I have to look for a new-to-me car that I can afford payments on. This was unexpected obviously so I don't have any extra money saved for a down payment. I have a part-time job opportunity that I should know about tomorrow (If I am hired or not). I suppose that the second job can basically pay my car payment and insurance as opposed to paying off my debt which is what I had intended. Hey, who wants to pay off debt when you can just get another loan? :(